the "please bear with me as I recount my part" post...

or skip it... it's for me.

My original plans for this weekend were to stay home and rest while RTO went to drill and then Monday we were supposed to leave for our "W007! ten years of wedded bliss" trip to D.C. but after talking to my mom on Wednesday last week I thought it might be a good idea to go to OKC since my grandmother had been in the hospital since Friday and my dad was planning on still being there through this weekend. And my sister was going to be having a birthday Saturday.

so I made cupcakes.

Thursday's prognosis was not good, but by the time I got there Friday they said things were looking much better. So I thought I'd end up spending Saturday and Sunday at the hospital. and Saturday seemed off to a good start. we went to lunch for Lola's birthday and came back and dad and his sister and their dad were waiting for the doctor to show up for an update, hoping it would be more positive news. but it wasn't.

I don't know how everyone else stays so calm. When dad told me it was going to be just a few hours I felt that usual weight on my chest I get when I panic. So I spent the rest of the afternoon waiting with my sister in the lobby and trying to keep myself distracted. She had to leave around four because she had a gig.

RTO came back from drill, which wasn't part of the original plan... he was going to stay in Stillwater, but they'd wound up working in Guthrie and so it was closer to come back to OKC than go back to Stillwater. I hadn't told him the news when he called thinking I would just tell him when he got there.

and that's probably the image that will stick with me. He'd come up and I told him the news and he decided to go get his laptop out of the car to maybe get some work done while we waited. and just as he stepped off the elevator we heard "code blue 455" and he sat down and said, "Isn't that her room number?" yep. and then we heard a cancellation, but I don't know what a "code blue" is and didn't think it really mattered. it was pretty obvious. dad showed up shortly after that to confirm my suspicions.

So most of the evening was spent making phone calls and I got to hear dad and grandpa's and my aunt's version of the events of the past week a few times. and now here's mine, as short as it is. and probably disjointed. and I'm still the one that's all teary and can't control it. I finally figured out the way to get to sleep and quit covering my (technically grandpa's guest) pillow in snot was to mentally sing through things I've been working on lately. I have to concentrate to remember the words since they aren't solidly in my brain yet.

anyhoo, we're back home for the evening since we hadn't planned on being there past today and didn't have the appropriate clothing for the next few days (oh also, there was "whatshisface" to bring back ;D).

we managed to get the trip cancelled... for now. Mom and dad kept telling us today we have to go cause we've been looking forward to it since August. (really before that, but that was when I decided it was officially a plan) I think RTO is still going to take the week off as originally planned, so that will be nice. We've already discussed going to see Quantum of Solace Friday afternoon.

and I should probably conk out now